Me, I’m

I love swiping across cracks on my age-old phone. My fingerprint is the motion of a pocket ripped by iphone-drops.

I am someone who has a phone. The dentist is surprised at how cracked it is and I’m like: “You are filling the whole in my jaw bone, where there is no tooth, and you are surprised my phone is cracked?”

My thinking is 40% or so of people have fake front teeth. I am one of the few who is not lying about it and I am fashion-as-fuck. There’s line out the door.

Can’t read your texts though: my screen is broken.


Dazzling visuals from ocular migraines – 3 in a week. I would rather have a migraine than go to work though.

After the gorgeous fabrications made by my visual cortex had run their course yesterday I went to pick up Sean’s dad from jail. We talked about music during the half hour wait for the towing guy to get to his office so Sean’s dad could give him the car title.

Familiar sounds filled the house as dad played Pac-The-Man and Tetris. We have been collaborating on keeping the kitchen clean and making meals. Dad has been employing Sean and bringing home many tortillas. Also making fresh salsa every day.

Dad, Sean’s dad, Noah, Sean, and I ate pomegranate seeds out of shot glasses as it got dark. I applied for a residency that takes place on a commercial ship and wrote an admissions essay for graduate school.

I got home with tomatoes (for salsa), greens, beans, beets, onions. Noah and Sean came home with tortilla chips, tomatoes (for salsa), tortillas, sugar cereal, whipped cream, ramen. Dad got home with tortilla chips, tomatoes (for salsa), Tortillas, beer.

Dad and Sean did Whip-Its. “When I lived in Seattle, I used to buy a can of whipped cream, do nitrous at the bus stop – doing whip-its is the best way to take the bus.”

Dad: “Like driving, work is dangerous and boring.”
Me:  “Today I thought about how I would rather have a migraine than be at work.”
Dad gives me a high 5.
Dad: “Today I had 5 beers at work, no one to tell me not to.”

Sean didn’t go to work because he was taking the “drunk driving test.” He failed the first time, passed the second time.

Dad puts a golden-embossed sticker that says “Family”  on our dehydrator – where we ironically place many stickers. We all eat salsa.

Shovel Snow

When my resume asked me what the hell I have been doing for the past year I told it: “Social media management and web development/strategy.” When someone asks me at a show or a party I generally tell them that I shovel snow.

I am happy to once again make the revelation that I am a Murakami protagonist. Shoveling cultural snow. It keeps piling up and someone has to deal with it.

My blogging output varies, last month I wrote 600 posts. Each day I stacked them up, compiling a document, opening multiple tabs to write in product code, and then publishing them in a flurry, leaving one at the top for people to not-read. At month’s end I analyze my work’s effectiveness across spreadsheets.

Through osmosis (and research) my knowledge of luxury fashion, and the fashion world in general has expanded, but my basic outlook remains critical and reductive – occasionally I get in trouble for being “too intellectual.”

Here are excerpts of (SEO boosting) flippancy that I have buried in the web:

“A Noir Kei Ninomiya Bag furthers the brand’s textural exploration of black. Synthetic leather is formed into flowers, referencing plant life with a material that alludes to animal death.”

“Conceptually, Issey Miyake 132 5. is focused on regeneration and re-creation. This circularity is embodied literally through the complex geometric forms that each garment can fold into.”

“Jackets are always key pieces for Rick Owens, the Clean Biker Jacket in Blood completes a moody look with a funnel neck, a dropped back, and Rick Owens’ classic internal pockets for a passport, book, or sandwich.”

“A Brunello Cucinelli sheep costume is embellished with silver detail along the neckline.”

Our website redesign has just launched, and the web manager is having me go back to delete all my old posts. “Practice futility” Bea says. Never look back.


I may be a bad girl

but morality is relative

and gender isn’t real

A made up line between zero and infinity

please enjoy everything

I may be a bad girl

but morality is relative

and gender isn’t real

a made up line between zero and infinity

please enjoy everything

the idea of the idea of

every day I play a game called “day”


Listening to Angelo Harmsworth – lulling, urgent poignancy, delicately illuminated, discovered through various points in the body.

Doing the dishes – Feel sad or weird for some reason? Do the dishes. Weepy – bad premonition? Make sure all the dishes are done. In poor health? Chronic infection? hangover? someone die? Clean every dish.